The Rewards of Fatherhood, Fitness and Frugality
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25 Random Things… The BPC Version

Blooregard Q. Kazoo
Flickr by lilybdcsa

I thought I’d take this “25 Random Things…” meme I’ve been getting from a bunch of my friends and put a BPC twist on it.

  1. When Chocolate Thunda (my 3-year-old daughter) curses like a sailor (so far it’s just “sh#t” and “f*ck”) I have to hide my face in a pillow or look away because it’s hilarious to me.
  2. Being called “Dad” or “Daddy” is about the best thing in life I can think of but hearing it 30 times in less than 5 minutes makes me want to pull my hair out… what’s left of it.
  3. I know all the Top 40 hits because I can’t listen to hip-hop in my car anymore.
  4. Thing One (my 8-year-old daughter) was being followed by two boys, probably about 10-years-old each, on bikes the end of last summer while the two of us were walking to a movie. I finally asked what they wanted, one got scared and rode away and the other said quickly and loudly to my daughter “You have pretty hair!” Then he high-tailed it. They must have seen the steam coming from my ears. NOT UNTIL SHE’S 21 PUNKS!!!
  5. I don’t believe in spanking but I raise my voice way too often.
  6. I hate playdates!
  7. T-One is smarter (and tougher) than me and C-Thunda is tougher (and smarter) than me.
  8. I have cried more since I turned 30 years-old than I did in the 30 years prior to that. Having daughters will make you sensitive.
  9. Sons are so overrated. “Sigh”.
  10. My stomach aches when they go back to their mom’s on her visitation time.
  11. I know how to wash, condition, wet-set, braid, cornrow, flatten and curl.
  12. I wish my daughters liked me as much as they like Blooregard Q. Kazoo.
  13. Everything I know about parenting I learned from my parents and the Huxtibles! I’ll never forget the episodes when Rudy got her period, when Theo wanted to move out and Heathcliff taught him a finance lesson using monopoly money and when Vanessa brought home Dabness “on a garbage can lid”.
  14. I never lie to my daughters but I might delay the conversation. I’m not ready to answer “Dad, what’s masturbation?” in the middle of the Transformers movie.
  15. I always call my fellow dads and ask “What would you do?”
  16. I saw a woman, who was huge by the way, beat the crap out of her child once and felt like I should confront her and didn’t. I cried later because I felt like a coward.
  17. I joined the PTA to be informed but I’m feeling like I don’t need to be that informed.
  18. Family court sucks!! Avoid it at all costs.
  19. Small children serve as convenient weights. In a pinch I’ll lift them for a quick workout.
  20. T-One wants me to get married. I’m trying my best to de-program her. I’ve let her watch too many romantic comedies.
  21. Most of my child having men friends are getting vasectomies. Hmmm.
  22. C-Thunda still gives me as many kisses as I want but T-One announced she would hold my hand when crossing the street only until she turned 10 years-old, then it’s over. Gather ye rosebuds while ye may.
  23. I love snowdays because I don’t have to get the girls ready in the morning and can sleep an extra hour.
  24. The only thing keeping me from having 15 children is money, time, a willing partner and a desire to keep most of my hair. “Daddy, Daddy, Daddy” every other minute 15 times over? I’m happy with my two.
  25. Being a parent is friggin’ awesome but it’s tough. I personally couldn’t do it (well) without the help of my immediate and extended family. Thanks!
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1 mariajosé riera { 02.04.09 at 5:56 pm }

ben, this is great. it’s amazing to see what an impact 2 little girls can have on a grown man….happy fatherhood!

2 Steelergurl { 02.04.09 at 9:53 pm }

Ben – I tell you all the time, women read this and melt – seriously. I know you don’t believe me, but it’s true. You are a wonderful dad, loving and nurturing, and there’s absolutely nothing more sexy!! (we day that now when we’re all grown and out of our thug phase :-) )

Bet the ladies in the house agree with me, right??

3 Bruce Johnson { 02.05.09 at 2:16 pm }

Ben – I have one of each and I wouldn’t trade her for anything. The boy is another story! JK. The one thing I notice, I have never laughed as hard as when they say something that I’m not expecting them to say. Absolutely true story. We were looking for a restaurant to go to and my son says, “Let’s go to Uno’s”. I say, “We’re looking for a restaurant that’s a little nicer tonight”. He says, “How about Dos?” There is nothing funnier than your children.

Keep up the good work, my man!

4 Angel { 02.05.09 at 3:50 pm }

I bet you are a great dad! Many blessing!

5 Darla { 02.05.09 at 6:34 pm }

You as well are clearly an excellent parent…kids are the best part of life..they keep me going…and my daughter isn’t dating until at least 21…if I don’t send her to a convent first to become a nun! My son…well no one will ever be as good as his mommy :) Your girls will be forever indebted to you for being such a great dad…I am to my dad, and I wouldn’t have it any other way!

6 E. Payne { 02.06.09 at 12:05 pm }

Nice! From one daddy blogger to another, good luck on your journey. In 2 days it will be a year of blogging about my life with the wife and kids and I must say I never thought it could’ve been the positive experience that it has. For both myself and my readers.

Thanks for putting me on your blogroll, of course I’m adding you to mine.


PS – I’ve been resisting this 25 random things thing for months, but like you rather than post on FB I think I’m going to blog about it next week.

7 Mocha Dad { 02.08.09 at 6:16 pm }

Welcome to the world of blogging. I’m looking forward to reading more. Us dads must stick together.

8 Duchess { 02.09.09 at 5:57 pm }

Bakaar stop telling on sweet little C-Thunda. You know she got those words from…………you know who!

9 Maria { 02.11.09 at 10:14 pm }

yes, you need to stop fibbing….you have a willing partner…

10 Tami Nichole Rucker-Gage { 02.16.09 at 10:34 pm }

One of the characters from my one-woman show said she wishes she was your “baby mama” LOL – Seriously Ben Taylor, I can feel the love through the screen. Those girls are definitely blessed to have you and believe me, it will have a huge impact on who they become. By the way, I have 2 boys, maybe we can make some arrangements, I’m sayin…..

11 Wenylla { 02.17.09 at 1:46 pm }

This was cute. I have to agree with the folks above. My sis told me she loved how you wrote about your girls and she was right. @ Bruce Johnson, I have two sons and maaaan that testosterone ain’t nothin to mess with. Girls seem so much softer.

12 Ben { 02.18.09 at 2:34 pm }

@ Wenylla: With girls I have a different issue. Like they fight over stuff like who is going to use the hanger with the nice designs and crocheted (sp) cover on it to hang up their winter coat. Or the mood swings and the silent treatment. They’re little women! And as much as I try and will keep trying to understand women, let’s be real, I never will. Us guys are simple. Feed us and let us roll in the dirt and we’re cool.

13 Sheridan Burton { 02.19.09 at 1:02 pm }

Hey Ben, my son & my favorite character is also Blooregard! I understand how two little girls can fight over ‘little’ things. My sister & I went through it too. To this day, you can’t have a family dinner without competition :) Thankfully, God blessed me with two BOYS. hang in there. It only gets…more interesting. :)

14 Holly { 03.12.09 at 1:39 pm }

I had a tough time choosing which post to comment on first. It was between this one and the Amy chick one. I picked this one so that I can write about a more pleasant topic. It’s so funny because I was just telling a (caucasian) friend that I grew up in a “big piece of the chicken” household, and explaining what that means. So I love this blog because I really miss my dad. He loved being a dad like you love being a dad.

With regard to #22, don’t worry. There was a period of time when I stopped holding my dad’s hand. But even when I was off at school, whenever I felt nervous or uncertain, I felt him holding my hand. (Remind me to tell you about the time in b-school after I took the marketing final and they had to page my dad at work…) When I grew up and became a woman, whenever I’d see my dad, I’d hold his hand. Just because.

15 Ben { 03.12.09 at 3:25 pm }

@Holly: Thanks, I feel a lot better.

16 Sophia { 03.19.09 at 8:54 pm }

Ben, i really enjoyed reading your blog. I found it very entertaining and all I can say is I’m glad i have a boy!

17 Thing One { 10.30.10 at 4:39 pm }

I’m not that bad… am I?

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